its love all the way

it is love...

i can see my self smiling all the time.....
i can feel his kiss truly and give me shiver.....

it is love...

i can feel huge hug...and shower me with smile.....

it is love...

and its loving you...

251107

i could scream on the top of my lunge and said......I HAVE A BOYFRIEND......

and i hope...this is last......till end.....


terimakasih TUHAN....kadonya sangat indah.....dan semoga dialah Orang yang tepat....

i choose you

i can wait for you...but u never know how many hours i`ve count just to get to you...

so many days go by ...and wishing every moment with come true.....

so then....i decide i choose you....to be with me....until i make my final decision....

di ujung tahun

i`ve been experienced so many laugh...lots of tears.handfull of joy....a touch of lust....comfort zone...
this year....

i know by now...what i want....i want to settle down.....i dunno who will be with me for the rest of the journey...but i`m sure he has kind and sincere heart.....


by now,i know GOD provide me with all the possibility....and i know....i need to certain first....

i could not ask for more for this year gift.....i could wish that somewhere between the line...we wished for the same thing.....

counting days

i`m counting days...to let all my feelings go away...
i`m counting days....to free my guardian angels....

i`m counting days....to release my emotions...

i`m counting days...to see beyond my imagination....

i`m counting days...to be guard by new angels...

i am not always strong

gue ga se kuat yg orang kira....punya banyak temen laki2x....ga selalu membuat loe juga jadi kuat kan?? mereka adlah tempat dimana gue berlindung,lari dari segala masalah2x gue...lari dri segala sedih dan sakit hati gue....padahal kaum merekalah yang menyakiti....

ada kalanya ingin sekali di perhatiin ....and craving for more....ingin rasanya jadi centre of the universe...semua harus ngertiin gue....harus..tanpa terkecuali....kenapa gue ga boleh egois....????
ga fair...

but at the end of the day....i could never ask for more than this....i could try to stand up everytime i fall...i could never be weak..i `m surrounded by strong character...that should do just fine...

but don`t i deserve a tiny attention...???

bermimpi

tadi malem.....ketika rasa kantuk sangat menyerang.....tertidur pulas....dan tiba2x aku terbawa ke sebuah tempat.....airport....

yg jelas bukan di cengkareng....tapi disebuah airport....lalu aku bertemu dengannya....keliatan lebih kurus....lalu dia duduk disebelahku...dan aku bingung......kenapa dari semua tempat...harus tempat ini aku bertemu....lalu dia blg....i`m so sorry...so sorry...dan dia mrangkul, merebahkan kepalaku di dadanya sambil mencium kepalaku....lalu aku tetep terdiam dan ...bingung.....nothing even a single tears...

lalu panggilan aku pergi pun datang.....lalu dia beranjak dengan marah......menjauh......dan dia kembali lagi dengan blg klo cincin itu masi di pakai...aku ga akan ninggalin kamu lagi.....dan aku terdiam lagi...cincin apaan??? is he talk with the wrong person....???

lalu aku akan melewati pintu gerbang.....yg akan melwati semua kejadian aiport ini....lalu dia berteriak....kamu ga pake cincinnya??? dan saya terdiam..saya hanya bertanya cincin apa???

dia berlari lagi....dan entah mengapa aku mengejarnya.....aku mengejarnya hingga tiba2x aku merogoh kantungku dn ada cincin didalam situ....inikah cincin yang dia maksud...


dan terbangun melihat tanganku....cincin itu tidak pernah ada...dan tak akan pernah ada....
mgkn aku merindu sosoknya yang menjauh....namun aku pun terhenti ketika mengejarnya....aku ga tau apa yg kukejar.....

emotionally breakdown....

this is not the closure i expected.....i asked to be guided...but i never knew...my acceptance would damage my emotion also....

13 oct...was my closing date....just when i want to enjoy every single happiness i had left...in the celebration of iedul fitri..where everybody forgiving....and make it a new day....i found it hard to forgive myself and the person that i adored in the past few weeks...

i asked earlier...to be guided and tooked me far away from him.....i should be by now...accepted this...but it eaten my emotion....it eaten me alive....

i wished i had a nice hello and goodbye ...but instead..i have to deal it with the hard way...the unspoken goodbye....

but deep down inside my heart...i dont deserve this anymore....if i could scream on the top of lung...

i knew everything happens for a reason....i just don`t want to hear it again and again...

countdown to my bday

menjelang hari raya...hari kemenangan...tersimpan sebuah rasa sedih yang mendalam...
menjelang hari ulang tahun...hari pertambahan usia..tersimpan rasa hampa.

Tuhan....terimakasih atas titipannya yg begitu indah..aku kembalikan kepadamu...aku kembalikan dia kepada orang - orang yang membutuhkan..walaupun aku masi ingin menyimpannya...aku tidak boleh egois....karena kau telah begitu baik menitipkannya padaku...disaat momen hari ultah dan hari raya datang...

Tuhan....semoga kado ulang tahunku nanti dan kado hari kemenanganku nanti begitu indah adanya...dan bisa kumiliki selamanya.....

belon apa 2x udah sedih duluan

the fact that u have something good in front of you.and u can`t even touch ,u could only see it..makes you wonder how does it feel to touch it.

what has your heart tells you..when u dream about this for so long...and makes you become a happy person and yet you still feel slightest hurt underneath it all.

i face the fact...i become happier person ...but imagine my heart torn apart into pieces....and knowing that is just what i want not consider other people`s heart...am i become selfish?? just want it for my last journey....

why am i have to travel more...when i know i found a wonderful place....
why am i have to look the other way around..when all i need is here....

why am i have to suffer for having this pure truly feeling....